Ryan Adams said this, "the sadness is mine."
Today, I say it. Sadness, realizing that I am the most productive by myself, but most motivated when with other people. Now, that is a rather large discrepancy. How do I reconcile that? I get most motivated when other people are around, but I get more done when they leave?
What am I suppose to do? "Hey Chad, yeah, can you come over for I dunno, 20 minutes, and give me a pep talk", I'd say. Then 20 minutes in, "Okay, now get the F out!"
I don't see how that works. I love to share my idea's with people, with friends, but when I do, I don't get much movement on them. But when I keep them bottled up, I need to see some sort of movement, so they come out in actually getting it done.
Then there is the side of me, that after sharing my dreams, and good ones they are, with a friend, I immediately turn around and think that they might steal my idea and do it themselves. After all, they have more money, more connections, etc. So then I talk myself into trust issues with my closest friends.
As you can see, the sadness is mine. And still no running bike to take it out on the road.
Damn shame.
